What Schemes are Made of
by Belfaust
Summary: Tsunade wants Naruto to be her special missionary ninja. She a special plan for him. Naruto is to stupid to get the picture and thinks its his first Sranked Mission. Part5 is up and more weird stuff starts to happen.
1. Chapter 1

**What Schemes Are Made Of**

**Tsunade's Office**

Tsunade thought about everything rationally. However there are always mitigating circumstances. At this moment Tsunade needed a quick roll in the haystack. It wasn't the first time she thought of usurping her political power. She could easily order anyone on this "special mission." After all, it has been far too long. There was the legendary Kakashi who was too intelligent for his own good. There were many other candidates. Perhaps what she needed was someone more blunt, but someone who can maintain a certain amount of anonymity.

Sitting at her desk she flips through her profiles of every ninja but she already knows the perfect candidate. Who else but this low rank ninja would jump at an A-rank mission assignment? And in his time absence training he has certainly grown. "Bad Tsunade." She thought.

Moments Later…

"Kakashi's Team has arrived for his 5 o'clock appointed summoning."

"Send them in." Tsunade called.

Kakashi, Sakura, and Naruto materialized in the center of the stone tiled office. Naruto is smiling so that his eyes were squinty and his arms behind his head. "Yo! Old Lady Tsunade!" Tsunade bit her lip. She hated being called old. The rest of the team merely bowed. What was she thinking? _He totally wouldn't go for it. In fact any idiot would see through it._

"Sakura you and Kakashi are to escort a supply shipment. The details are in this envelope. Naruto, I have a mission for you. In fact it's an "S-class" mission. You interested?" she winked an extremely obvious wink however everyone in the room mistook that as a wink of acknowledging Naruto's developed strength. Kakashi is smart, hopefully he did not accurately interpret the gesture. Tsunade had to be careful not only communicate this thought to Naruto and to him alone.

"Yeah!!!" he jumps. Energetic as always she smiles.

"Due to the sensitive nature of this assignment we need to discuss the details of this assignment in private."

"Forgive my intrusion Hokage, might I suggest, Naruto is not ready for an S-class mission." Kakashi stated.

"You don't even know the details of the assignment. It's a special mission but well within Naruto's caliber. Naruto you are to meet your informant at this location and time. Do not be late. The rest of you are dismissed. Naruto, wait a moment as a prepare you with something." Tsunade passed Naruto a piece of paper folded with Tsunade's office seal on it. Presumably, the paper contained the details of the mission. The team bowed and vanished. Tsunade gave a wicked smiled as she set her devious machinations in motion. Naruto stood there looking at her.

"Oh you won't regret this! I won't let you down."

"Shut up." Naruto paused after hearing Tsunade say this. "You are to never speak of this mission. You will never ever discuss it. You will only report to me. Before we begin we need to talk about safe locations. Places where we can meet without suspicion."

"Is there an mole within our village?"

"Yes that's why we must trust no one but you and me." Tsunade continued. "Theres also something else Naruto. I am going to give you kind of power you've never felt before. Are you brave enough to embrace it?" Tsunade looked at Naruto's crotch and then met his eyes again. She stepped forward to a nervous frozen statue of the boy demon. Her hands glow with chakra and she wraps an arm around his back and moves slowly lower and lower. The other hand takes hold of Naruto's free hand and then she moves it in between her legs and in between Naruto's legs. He feels the vibration and sensation. "Do you know what this power is?" _Tsunade, get a hold of yourself_. She thought as she broke off the hold she had and teased a little kiss on his neck. "When you meet your informant, wear something nice. "Do you have evening wear?"

"Like pajamas?"

"No idiot, like semi-formal wear."

"Nope." Naruto's grin got wider and wider. She couldn't tell if Naruto was excited as she was. Or if he was completely thick skulked and thinks this is a real mission.

"I get it! I need to dress slick because I am going to be a Ninja-Spy!!!!!" Okay so Naruto wasn't very bright. But he was the only real candidate in Tsunade's twisted game.

"Naruto. I want you to be sharp about your whits. Careful what you mention to people. You are my right hand man. Your services will be rewarded." she whispers into Naruto's ear. "Now go…"

Naruto whispers back. "Why are you whispering, are people watching us?" Tsunade grabbed Naruto by the head and pulled his head to her large breasts and hugged him. _Why are you so stupid_?, she thought as she rocked him slowly.

"I understand!" Naruto yelled.

"You do?" Tsunade winked again. No could mistake this sensual hug.

"This mission is obviously so dangerous I may not return! Only in times of peril you can show you truly care. Thank you Hokage! I won't let you down." Naruto hugged Tsunade back and then stepped back. He saluted her and disappeared. Tsunade sighed in disbelief. Cute kid really.

**Outside the Tower**

Naruto walked the night street excited as ever. "What does it say?" Sakura exclaimed. She had waited for her shinobi friend to come out of the meeting. She was truly proud that her comrade was getting the recognition he deserved but really. She resented it. The past two years she trained hard under Tsunade and yet no sign of recognition.

"A ninja can't disclose that kind of information! This is an S-class assignment! I am finally getting the recognition I deserve despite being a Genin! Yahhahah!" Naruto's arrogant comment snapped the ego-centric girl and now her jealously was in full effect.

"Idiot! Don't think you're all high and mighty just because."

"Naruto," Kakashi interupted. "This is the highest honor, Naruto. However, You need to be careful and not let this get to your head. In fact, usually S ranked mission usually ends with causalities. You must not let your arrogance prevent you from accomplishing your task." Naruto bowed at his sensei's wisdom and then stuck his tongue out at Sakura. Sakura's blood boiled.

"Behold, Sakura-chan! I am to meet my secret informant at the ….the…Ichiraku Ramen Bar?!!" Naruto jaw dropped.

"Ahhhahahahahah." Sakura laughed. "You should be glad they honored the great Naruto's taste for cheap road shop Ramen!" Sakura was going to be there to spy on Naruto.

Naruto still shocked grumbled off to his glorious location. "Hey maybe you can get a pork combo from your informant as a bonus! Ahhahaha." She laughed. Naruto bit his lip. _What kind of serious mission could this be? Maybe the briefing will be conducted over food. There is nothing wrong with that._

**Ichiraku Ramen Shop – The way to a mans heart is his stomach…**

Naruto saw only one dark figure silhouetted by the light from the noodle stand. He approached the hooded figure. "Naruto. Please sit." The figure revealed herself as a makeup applied sexy disguised Tsunade without looking toward Naruto.

"Hey Tsuna..acckkk" Naruto was silenced by a hand over his mouth.

"Shhh. Quite down idiot! Now before we begin with the details Naruto-kun, lets start with some Ramen."

"Yes! Two orders of the regular please!" Tsunade turned to the Fox boy.

"I like a man who know what to order for a lady!"

"What are you having Tsunade?" Tsunade's forehead vein pumps. This boy will give her an aneurysm.

"Ayame! water please!"

"Oh my I forgot, Naruto you've grown so much. You're so big and strong it's about time you had your first shot of Sake." Tsunade winked and signaled for two orders of sake. Naruto began to let the ego of his first S-class assignment get to him. Naruto placed one hand behind his head and felt flushed. _What an honor_ Naruto thought. _My first alcoholic beverage with the Hokage!_

"I suppose I am old enough to finally enjoy a good drink!" Naruto said as raised the dish. The blond woman in front of him that always seemed so old in his eyes was smiling something sinister. Perhaps this was a test? Oh well. "Cheer, old lady!"

Hours later….Tsunade was kissing Naruto up and down his neck that made him nervous and uneasy. It was not even secretive, classy, or discrete. They were the only people there except for the Old man and his daughter Ayame who could totally see the shameless act but Tsunade's judgments was impaired and she wanted Naruto. Tsunade was a vicious cougar and Naruto was an innocent demon fox to the slaughter.

"You know old Lady you're actually fun to drink with! I feel like laughing all the time."

"Oh Naruto-kun? I am more fun than you know. Take a look for yourself." Tsunade was pouring herself sake to her flat shot dish with the bottle pressed between her bosoms. "another round Naruto?"

"Hey Old Lady Tsunade! If you're really old, how can you hold that bottle up!" he pointed. That was followed up by a punch to the head! Tsunade tried to stay calm. "Finish this idiot!" Naruto started to drink the rest of the bottle and placed the empty container on the bar next to several other empty bottles. "See ya Oldman! Ayame!" Naruto reached for his wallet but found it was not there. Tsunade took this a third opportunity to gain his attention. "I'll spot you but you need to walk me home. I'm afraid I had too much to drink!"

"of course tsu-HIC!" Naruto said hiccupping and then stumbling face first to the dirt pavement. This was harder then expected. Tsunade grumbled and tried again.

"Okay, lazy boy, I'm gonna walk you home." She helped him up and supported Naruto like a crutch. "Left foot, right foot, left foot!"

"Tsunade, what was the mission again? What happened to my Ramen? Why is the floor spinning?"

"BAKA I already told you it's a secret training mission. You ate it two hours ago. The floor in fine, its your head that's spinning and stop yelling!"

"Yes!"

**Standing on Top of a streetlight.**

On top of a streetlight was the perfect spot during the night time. With the lights casting down ward at night, there was no way anyone could see her. Lurking in the distance, Sakura spied and gasped at the sight of what she had been witnessing. She had to save Naruto and expose the Hokage! _But this is my sensei!_

"Hey ugly forehead girl!" said a blonde skinny girl. "What are you doing up there? Stalking cute boys like hideous creature in the darkness?" Okay so there were some flaws with her hiding spot. Sakura jumped down and yanked Ino into the bushes.

"Quiet! Tsunade is making perverted moves on Naruto! We have to save him!"

"Why should I? Why should you? Are you jealous?" Ino inquired."

"No way! Its just that Naruto is our friend and it would be irresponsible to let a friend in need be taken advantage of!" she stated

"Boys don't want to be saved from woman like that!"

"Shes really 50 something years old." Sakura muttered.

Kakashi was reading his perverted book lurking in the darkness as well behind Sakura. She didn't even notice the sneaky ninja. "Sakura. Your curiosity has now left you with a predicament. If you try to persue the Hokage by yourself, she will detect you allowing her to know what you know that she knows. Naruto's purity hangs in the balance of your next move. If you do nothing, Naruto maybe in danger."

"What do you suggest?"

"We shall disguise ourselves as pedestrians and compromise her position..."

"NO TIME!!!!" she yelled and charged with Ino in her clutches.

_Hasty idiots._Kakashi began to read his book once more.

Sakura ran after Tsunade in a flight. Disguises were easy enough but there is a certain amount of satisfaction Sakura needed by allowing Tsunade to know it was her who knows her current position. Sakura needed to cockblock Naruto for his own good. _Tsunade was way too old_. "Tsunade, what's wrong with Naruto!" Sakura waved. Ino waved too. This began an awkward chase forcing Tsunade to quickly change into Naruto. The two Narutos acted drunk however one was really a hasty Tsunade who threw the other Naruto on his back and started to run. With her superhuman strength, she could run off with Naruto on her back with ease. Ino would not be able to catch her. However Sakura was also strong and materialized in front of the two Narutos with her arms folded tapping her feet.

"Hey Sakura! What seems to be the problem?"

"You tell me old lady Tsunade!!!"

"What makes you say something silly like that?"

"We saw you try to take advantage of Naruto!" she pointed. Ino soon caught up.

"I was drinking by myself and only I pretended to be Tsunade to get served Sake! Now I have to get home by myself so why not use a shadow clone to help. Well got to go, bye bye!" Tsunade said in Naruto form running while piggy backing another Naruto. The more wasted Naruto was holding and looked up.

"Oh Sakura-san, what are you doing here cutie? I feel dizzy. You look so pretty tonight that my head is spinning!"

"Shut up!" said the other Naruto.

And then Sakura knew for sure. _Since when did shadow clones act independently with their own thought_. Two can play at this game, thought Sakura. Game on.

**Outside Naruto's apartment.**

Sakura waited at the door. There she saw two Narutos walking up to the apartment. "Naruto why do you need two of you if you're trying to get home? Which one is the real one and which one is the clone? Wouldn't the clone be just as drunk?"

Both Naruto's looked up. "I am the real one!" They both said. "I'm drunk, sorry, hes' the real one." they both said pointing at each other. "I have to pee!!!" Tsunade in Naruto form started to fiddle for the keys from the other Naruto's pocket. The real Naruto was eyeing up Ino and Sakura stumbling and squinting. The more sober Naruto-Tsunade pulled the other one in the door and slammed the door. However Sakura blocked the door with her foot.

"Naruto? Wouldn't you invite me in? I know you always had a crush on me!" Sakura said winking. One Naruto was applying inhuman strength to close the door while the other Naruto was trying to pry the door open pull Sakura in.

Finally Tsunade shoved Sakura out the door and finally locked the door. Tsunade grabbed Naruto in a heat of passion and kissed him.

Ino and Sakura tried to peer in to the window and tapped on it when Tsunade pulled the blinds down and turned back. into her form. _Yes, I finally have Naruto all to myself!_ Naruto laughed. "That was fun but please don't kiss me in when you look like ME!!" The drunken fox boy started to make out with Tsunade and felt her boobs. While dragging the demon boy to the bed, there was a pounding at the door.

"Is everything alright in there? Naruto let me in. I need to talk. I'm busting in the door!" Tsunade imitated Naruto's voice.

"Go home! I'm busy! I'm tired. Long day ahead of me. Don't bust in. I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Why was your Shadow Clone making out with you! Are you playing with yourself using Shadow clones? That's gross!"

"Yeah!" agreed Ino "Unless someone were to come clean. Say a certain old woman!" In the distance Sakura can hear Naruto's voice kissing and moaning.

Sakura stomped her feet and beat her head against the door. Tsunade stopped making out with Naruto and finally got up. She was irritated. No irritated as several blocks ago. Angry was more accurate. Very very angry.

Tsunade got up and yelled in a Naruto voice, "Both of you go home!"

Ino exclaimed, "But Sakura and I are horny and we need some Shadow clone attention!" Ino winked at Sakura who was sighing in disgust.

"I'm not feeling well tonight. Maybe tomorrow?" Tsunade said wondering what freaks this newer generation has yielded.

"But Naruto you always take care of me when I'm this hot." Yells Ino.

"Sorry not tonight baby maybe tomorrow morning?"

"Ah ha!! I've never done it with Naruto. Hes an uncharismatic, unromantic brat! Oh you're definitely Tsunade and you're gonna get in trouuuubblle! Because I'm gonna tell my dad whose on the council. Oh enjoy that fox while you can because tomorrow there's going to be hell to pay!"

"Whose going to believe a skinny, attention craved bitch! Like you!" Tsunade said. Ino and Sakura pounded on the door until finally it sopped.

Tsunade sighed with relief and turned her attention back to find Naruto passed out on his bed snoring!!! Damn it she cursed.

"No no no, Naruto-kun wake up," she pleased trying to wake up the drunken fox boy. "Time to make Granny Tsunade happy." She started to kiss him all over and slide her hands down his pants but she soon gave up realizing Naruto was out cold. _I was so close, he was going for it!!!!_

**Part II. The Morning after!**

Tsunade was wearing Naruto's T-shirt only and started to make breakfast for two. The smell of eggs, sausage and toast filled the air. Naruto's whiskers twitched and he started to move. The light was hurting his eyes.

"Turn off the lights!" he yelled.

"Oh yes, Naruto you're awake! Good!" said Tsunade. She ran over and pounced on Naruto with the spatula still in hand and kiss him all over. "Granny Tsunade what are you doing?

"Don't you remember anything from last night. You were really frisky Naruto-kun!"

"Um no…"

"yeah you do. I can remind you." Tsunade said stroking naruto under the sheets.

"Naruto's eyes rolled back but the he spring to life.

"Whats the burning smell!" Naruto yelled. _It was the eggs and sausage! Oh no. Tsunade you're an idiot! _She thought to herself. She ran over to fix the mess. It was still salvageable. In the background, Naruto got up to pee. When he finished he stumbled back into bed and pulled the covers over his head. The blonde woman moved the food on to the plates and brought them over to the bed. She sat down next to Naruto and elbow nudged Naruto to come out. Naruto was reluctant but finally got up.

"So what happened" Naruto picked up a plate._ I don't know what I did. Is Tsunade my girl now? Did we go all the way?_

"I'm not telling, lets try to reenact it after breakfast." She winked. _I need to stop winking. Naruto doesn't even get it and I'm developing a habitual eye twitch._ Naruto looked down at his plate and slowly took a bite from him toast. He looked sad and then tears started to stream down his eyes. "What is it now idiot!"

"I can't even remember my first time! I'm trying and trying. But I can't remember anything. I mean you're a beautiful woman but I can't seem to remember." Naruto's mood changed and he wiped his eye. "I'm not really broken up about it." He put the plate down and put one arm around Tsunade. "Sasuke told me we are defined and made strong by pain. True pain comes from the suffering from the bonds that we make. Tsunade, you are now a bond and I always avoided these bonds because I don't want to hurt like that." Tsunade looked down at her plate. She no longer saw Naruto as piece of meat. She saw him as a boy. It was disgusting what he was doing to him.

"I'm sorry. Narut" she was cut off. By a kiss. Naruto was making out with her. She wanted to say this was wrong. She meant to say it. She wanted to apologize and run out. Naruto is young and fragile and maybe he is falling in love. She pulled away panting.

"Naruto…….. nothing happened last night………. We just made out." In between gasps for air, there were more kisses. They were a full salvo of kisses and she enjoyed it. She wanted to tear Naruto out of his clothes but she needed him to stop first. She finally mustered the courage to push him off.

"Tsunade! Its okay. I want this." Naruto smiled. Naruto pulled her in and undid his pants. Tsunade rocked on to her back when suddenly the alarm went off. It was the village alarm. The people were in panic. Tsunade looked at the time.

"Oh shit, shit, shit! I have to go!"

"What?"

"Its two in the afternoon!." Tsunade started to dress herself really fast. There was a knock at Naruto's door.

"Who is it?" Naruto said.

"Open up. There is an emergency. The Hokage has not shown up for work this morning at 8. We are doing an investigation. She was last seen with you Uzamaki-brat! Last night female ninjas has reported her at the Ichiraku. The chef claims she left with you after eating!" Naruto opened the door to a crack.

"I'm not changed yet but I'll cooperate. I'll open up in a minute." Behind the door Tsunade was rubbing Naruto and kissing his neck.. "We'll meet up after work" she whispered. Naruto held the door in place while the ANBU inspector tried to peer in however Naruto was blocking and he waited as Tsunade slid out the back window. She ducked down and blew him a kiss and ran away.

"Its to early to suspect the worst but we find her. The village depends on her safety." The inspector shoved the door in and found a pants less Naruto on the floor. He was using a pillow to cover himself. The bed was messy there was two plates and one fork had lipstick on it. The Inspector squinted his eyes and turned and smiled. "I see. I'll call off the investigation. This is ANBU 5 I suspect the Hokage will turn up shortly."

Part III. Tsunade's Office 

Tsunade tiptoed into her office. Her hair was ruffled. Her eyes were shot and makeup smeared. She looked good in a trashy way. Shizune was standing there the whole time. "You know you should have called in so the village wouldn't go full standby."

"Its not my fault the village always has a stick up its ass. I can't drink. I can't gamble and when I show up late to work, everyone is in a fit. Can't I sleep in once and awhile?"

"Vacations need to told to me in advanced. Plus we checked your house and no one has been in it all night. What were we to think?"

"Maybe I was getting laid. Ever think of that?"

"But miss! Aren't you a little old to be fooling around?"

"Shizune! 53 is not that old. There are plenty of hot older women that are 53! Just call off the search. I just want this day to be over!" But the day wasn't over. Sakura and Ino had entered as Shizune left. Sakura had angry hateful eyes. She brought her usual tea and cookies for Tsunade.

"Sensei, I am reporting in today." She said grinding her teeth. "How was your night?"

"What do you care about my night she?" said looking at her paper work as if nothing was happening. "Don't you have training to do?" Sakura clenched her fist.

"What did you do to him Hokage-sama?" Sakura said

"My my Sakura! I never knew you wanted him all to yourself." she sneared and then went back to flipping paper work.

"Its not that. He is my closest friend since Sasuke left." Sakura looked at the floor. "Its not love that makes me protect him. Its just that he's always done the same for. If you hurt him, I won't forgive you." Tears ran down her face.

"Is that all?" Tsunade said in a cocky manor. Sakura ran out of the office. Sensing the hostility. Ino tried to back out. It wasn't a good time for a joke or a scheme. "What do you want?"

"Well I think that if this information got out, there would be a problem. I wouldn't want to see anything scandalous happen." Ino smirked. She was a sly one. "I think I need some company perks to help maintain my silence." Ino plopped herself on Tsunade's desk and started to file her nails. "I was thinking that you needed to place me to position of power for starters."

"I can name you enemy of the state and have you assassinated in your sleep. I could also have your life a nightmare unless you leave my office at once!"

"Eep" Ino ran out of the office. "I'll just shut the door and let you think about it."

Office Visit 

It's late at night. Naruto showed up to Tsunade's Office. He looked solemn. His eyes were serious. Tsunade was aroused by his stature. He approached her. "I told you Uzumaki, when I'm off of work.." She was truly becoming a workaholic. Tsunade stood up and approached the still silent boy. "I suppose I need a break." He kisses her and pressed against the desk.. He shoves her and she tears at his clothes. "Whats my name she pants?"

"Tsunade!"

"Again! Naruto!"

"Tsunade!"

"hmmm Naruto!"

"Tsunade!" Naruto's voice sounds like a girl. What? Then the world melts away. Tsunade wakes on a puddle of drool on the table. "Shizune!"

"Miss you shouldn't fall asleep in the office. I think someone didn't get enough sleep last night. Or maybe you're getting too old. Showing up late and then sleeping at work."

"Shizune! Why couldn't you let me dream a little longer? No matter what happens Tsunade always gets interrupted. Something happens where she just can't get Naruto. First he was too stupid, then he was too drunk, then we ran out of time and I was late for work and now I can't even fantasize. "I need a vacation. The Hokage appoints you and Sakura to do all the work for 2 weeks. I just need to be free for two weeks." Tsunade got up and left the tower. Her frustration has made her paper work sloppy. Her ninja skills were sloppy and now Ino, Sakura and the ANBU inspector all know about her discretions. Tsunade needed to just get free from it all. Well not all. She just needed time for a plan to come together and with no work for two weeks, she'll be sure to get what's coming to her. Shizune looked dumbfounded.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Cockblocker Sakura Part I**

Sakura stood over outcropping over a large cliff. It was her secret location. It is where her she'd fantasize over Sasuke. There was a memorial made of stone where she had cut her hand and the blood smeared on it meant to bring home Sasuke. There was going to be another promise…save Naruto.

The blood ran down Sakura's hand and spilled all over the stone. She whispers to her self, "I know I've failed you Sasuke, but if you valued anything about our friendship, don't let me fail in saving Naruto. It don't want him to loose his innocence and child-like nature. I won't loose another friend. Tsunade won't have Naruto used like a piece of meat. Even if he thinks he wants her." Sakura tied a band around her hand and then punched chunk out of the rock face and turned looking at the ground. "You're my last friend. The only true friend that's been there."

Tears fell to the ground.

"You really are annoying…you really are an idiot…." Sakura looked up and imagined Sasuke and what he would say if he were here. "I'm not around to be bothered so you have to ruin Naruto's life. Hahahah these bonds are made to make you suffer. Just sever them if you wish not to be hurt."

"I'm I really getting in his way?" she thought. "I don't care. Naruto is all I have, Sasuke. If you were here maybe I'd let him go. I wouldn't' need anyone else."

"And do what? Everyone liked me but I cared for none of them. What made me so special and cool? Why would I make a good mate? I am only an avenger. If you don't want to loose your last friend, don't let him end up like me." The apperition of Sakura's mind vanished.

"What am I supposed to do?" Sakura screamed. "he's all I have." She quietly wept.

**When I left Tsunade she was the Master….  
Part II.**

Naruto held his chest high and skipped down the street. He was whistling and holding a large wine pot. The sun was shinning and soon going to set into the horizon. He was happier the he had been in months. The stress of saving Garra and finding clues to hunt down Sasuke has tired the fox demon. The flashback triggered in Naruto's mind. Naruto stood at the bottom of the chasm-like pit caused from the explosion looking up at Sasuke.

"Didn't you want to become Hokage? Shouldn't you be training instead of chasing me? I speared your life on a whim, now I will easily kill you on whim."

"Should someone who can't even save his friend be hokage?" Sasuke's sword swung toward Naruto.

"Naruto, Now I can see it. So this is the source of your power. Who would have thought such a thing was inside you?" Sasuke sneered. His smile was wicked. His sharingan glared.

"An Uchiha? You have the sharingan. Such was the power of the cursed clan with eyes and chakra more sinister than my own."

"It seems that this isn't the first time you've seen a sharingan. Then you must be Kyuubi."

"Such were the eyes of Uchiha Madara."

"You expect me to know someone like that?" as he ripped a piece of Kyuubi's bubbling form causing him to dispel.

"Naruto, why are you hesitating? I am the only power you need to kill him. Even the most powerful Ochiha was only able to seal me and at the cost of his own life. I will give you all my power. You will be consumed with my hatred and my power. I am the only friend, the only bond you need. Bring him the only peace he deserves. Grant him the peace he seeks. I can make it happen. We can make it happen."

Naruto often thought about it. Was the only peace he could bring Sasuke was death? Was the only way he'd bring Sasuke back to Sakura was his ashes?

Sasuke glared at Naruto and Naruto often thought about what he'd say if he was actually around now. "Yeah buddy, good luck with the revenge and all. Let me know how it works out. I'm gonna get laid and then I'm gonna beat your ass afterwards."

Naruto didn't care anymore. Right now there was just the Hokage. She was hot, smoking hot. She was a medical ninja about to give him some sexual healing. She was going to do some crazy orgasmic chakra stuff to him that we're probably forbidden secrets lost long ago. As excited as little kid, Naruto felt as energetic as he did as a child and ran to meet his blond lover. This time his message said to meet her at her in an inn. The room number was nine and the spare key was wrapped inside. Naruto stuck the key in when she heard a yell.

"Naruto!" it was Sakura! She was standing outside where the inn doors were facing. Naruto looked over the banister where the second floor was. Room nine looked over it.

"Sakura, what are doing here?"

"I was just passing by, what are you doing outside an inn? You get booted out your home? You could always crash with me you know? You know it's a small place but we could share the bed! It's so empty. Why don't you walk me home since its getting dark!"

"Sakura, I can't. I'm busy." Naruto said.

_Oh know its happening,_ Sakura though. _I'm loosing him. My best friend._

"Why the interest suddenly, huh?"

"Look, just this once walk me home and you won't forget it. I promise. I'll give you something really special. You won't forget it!" Sakura ran to the stars where the inn rooms faced the out doors. When she reached the top stair she stumbled over the last one and fell face first.

"Ahhhh!"

"Sakura!"

"Its my ankle, Naruto. I can't move it. It's swelling up." Sakura smiled under her breath.

"Oh Sakura. It doesn't look swollen at all. Try standing on it?

Sakura made a valiant effort to put weight on it and fell once more.

"Sakura! Sorry! I was being a jerk." Naruto picked up Sakura and fumbled the keys to the hotel. He twisted the nob and threw his shoulder into the door.

Tsunade looked up at the commotion. She was wearing her kimono loosened with her shoulders revealing thus exposing more cleavage. "Naruto, I what the fuck is going on? I said don't let anyone see you coming. Not bring an extra girl!"

"Tsunade! Sakura just twisted her ankle. I think I made it worse by trying to have her stand on it. Oh, this is all my fault. I was too selfish." Naruto placed the girl on the bed. He took the champagne out of the ice bucket and dumped the ice into a bag. As he packed the ice on Sakura's ankle, she faked a sigh of pain. Tsunade folded her arms and pulled her robes up.

"Oh really. I haven't seen any swelling yet."

"It hasn't had time to swell." Sakura gritted her teeth. They exchanged glares. Naruto poured some champagne and handed it to Sakura.

"Hear, this is for the pain."

"Why thank you! Now you get a glass." Naruto filled the second glass and toasted the glass off Sakura. He was uneasy at the whole thing.

"To my hero! Once again saving me from any danger!" Tsunade was left out and the anger boiled. Her viens were pulsating. Naruto drank the bubbling drink and then got a wet compress and placed it on Sakura's head. "This will make you feel better too."

"Thanks Naruto, I don't know what I would have done if you weren't there."

"I dunno getting a life?" said Tsunade

"I do have a life its just don't work all the time so I can save up for that retirement."

"Okay! Who wants to see a movie?" Naruto said breaking up the hostility. "Lets see Tsunade rented Great Expectations. Only they spelled it with three Xs and look there's a little s in front." Tsunade put her head down and her hand on her forehead. The night could not get any worse.

"So Naruto you were running off to see Tsunade huh? I hope I'm not intruding but what's going on here?" Sakura tried to sound shocked. Naruto put the DVD in and sat on the bed and pulled Tsunade who was hot with embarrassment to sit down next to him. He placed and arm around her and another around Sakura.

"Naruto, why don't you let me sit in the middle, I don't want to slide off and injure my ankle anymore then it is."

"You know what? I'm gonna go" Tsunade said. She got up and took her back shoved her make up and handcuffs into it. She stepped into her sandals walked over to the champagn and took a swig from the bottle. Naruto looked dumbfounded as Tsunade took her hooded coat and pulled it over her head. She placed her sunglasses on so she could hide her identity walked out the door. Naruto chased Tsunade out of the inn and grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her by the waist. He kisses her.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Lets get another room. Lets just go somewhere else and I'll pick her up tomorrow."

"Naruto its not just that. Shes faking it! She wants to get in the way. I should just go."

"What if shes not faking it."

"I just know."

"Well forget about her. She can't stand in the way."

"Its not just that Naruto. I'm embarrassing my self. I could be your mother maybe an older aunt."

"Or my grandmother if my mom was really young!"

"You know, that's not helping." She said. "You know what? Fuck you and fuck you…" She was silenced by a kiss. Tsunade pulled back and Naruto's breath was against her skin.

"Even if you're that old I don't care. Maybe, I'm dumb and I just don't know the right things to say. Maybe I just blow everything when I try to do the right things. But you make me happy and I know I haven't been even though I act immature all the time. Just stay with me."

"I wish…" the tears dropped down to the pavement. Naruto looks down and touches his face. He checks his eyes. He looks up and Tsunade was gone.

**Part III**

Sakura was ecstatic. She saw Naruto was alone now and she peered around the corner. She sprinted to the bed and jumped up and down. Quickly she put the ice back on her foot as she heard Naruto approach.

"I thought you couldn't walk." He said slowly and sadly. His eyes looked only at the ground.

"I can't."

"I'm a far better ninja then you. I can sense everything around me. I only act like a fool to hide this pain I feel inside all the time. You just can't bare to see me happy can you?"

"Naruto, I did this for you. For us! She was trying to take you away from me?"

"You think this whole world revolves around you? Do you even love me? I thought you made it clear you were waiting for Sasuke. You made your choice, can't you let make my own mistakes?"

"She doesn't love you either. You're just a piece of meat to her. What could a woman like that see in a boy like you? You're just a fling, a coming fad. She'd leave you in the dust. I know her. She was my sensei. You think you're only ninja shes ever been with? She had many lovers long before you. She doesn't know you're all I have!" Naruto pulled Sakura by the arm to the pavement.

"Look Sakura! Really take a good look. Those aren't my tears!" Naruto turned and walked away.

"Where are you going? Don't leave me. Please! I was wrong! I'm sorry Naruto-kun!"

"You really are annoying." He said taking in a deep breath.

"Naruto will you hate me forever?" Naruto shook his head.

"I'll probably forgive you." Naruto said softly. "You're heart was in the right place. You thought you were saving me."

"You really have grown up a lot." Sakura said. She looked up and smiled. "I almost wished I fell for you instead."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Everybody Loves Naruto!**

Tsunade laid down along a couch on her balcony. Hours ago she had ran from the inn. Now she just wanted to sleep and forget about the night. The wind made her shiver and she pulled her comforter over her body. She stared at the sky.

"I can hear you Naruto. Come out." Naruto was behind her and plopped down next to her and wrapped himself in.

"You should go." Tsunade said not even looking at him. Naruto reached up through her clothes and undid them. He pulled the material and it glided with ease.

"Go now, before its too late. It should never have happened." Naruto doesn't say a word. He just keep easing his clothes off and articles of Tsunades.

"Naruto! If you don't leave right now, I'm going to…to…just give in." and with that Tsunade finally turned to Naruto and pulled the covers over the both of them.

**Part II.**

Naruto looked up and sighed. In his arms was a woman. _My first time._ He thought it wasn't going to end. There wasn't any crazy chakra involved like he imagined. There wasn't anything really special. It wasn't mind blowing. The first time isn't supposed to be this magical thing. "Wow that kinda sucked." Naruto's brow was flexed. He was discouraged. Nothing really makes you feel really bad until you hear those words but Tsunade never sugar coats anything. She's not one to lie about it. She smiles knows it wasn't all that bad. She puts her a hands to cup Naruto's face and she kisses his lips. "But you sure have a lot of potential." Naruto gleamed as she wiped the sweat from his face. "and stamina."

"I know."

"How?"

"Its my first time. I wasn't sure where to feel but…but I want to explore everything with you. We'll find what makes each other feel good, right?" Tsunade nodded and then her expression changed. She felt Naruto go stiff and she squeezes.

"Somebody's ready to train hard." Tsunade pulls the demon boy closer. As Naruto picks up speed she is combing her fingers into Naruto's spiky hair. Sweat beads form on the boy. His concentration makes him look cuter to her. She starts to tear into Naruto's back. Tsunade enjoys the feeling. She loves it. Still needs more practice but Naruto has always been a fast and eager learner.

**Part III. Say Anko!**

Anko was sharpening her weapons. She was sitting in a tree honing her senses. She felt her pray in the darkness. The night was best for her to stalk her pray. She inches forward for the kill. She can hear its breath. She can hear the rustling of the leaves. There was no way this deer would escape her deadly attack….

"Ohhhh my GOD!!! Naruto!" yelled a voice in the distance. The wild beast runs from the cries of pleasure. Anko is irritated but not intrigued by the sound. It came from the village. Anko's super hearing honed in on the location. "Where…pant…the fuck….pant…did that come from Naruto." Came the voice of Tsunade.

Anko flipped her weapon in the air and it fell into its sheath. There was a sensation coming over her. Not the kill. Her agitation came from another location: between her legs. _So Tsunade has a boy toy. Even the Hokage needs to share her special treat for the good of the village._ Anko knew that this demon chakra might be the animal that tames her wild side and satisfy her cravings.

**Part IV Say no Evil. Hear no Evil. Ino Evil.**

"Sakura? Why are you in my room?" Ino rubbed her eyes. It was really late. She was tucked under her sheets.

"Ino, Naruto hates me! I ruined it for him." Sakura sobbed. Ino was peeved for the window to her room was left open.

"I think I'm jealous. I love Sasuke but since he's been gone, I'm at that age where I think I just wanted to use Naruto myself and now I've lost him."

"Wow, you are one fucked up girl." Ino said yawning. "You going to hear this from a lots of shrinks but I'm going to be the first to say you're messed up. You're a hypocrite and a…" the sobbing got louder.

"I know. Is it possible to love two people at the same time?" Sakura whimpered.

"Yeah its possible to even like more than that."

"It is?" Sakura said sniffing.

"Yup, when you're a complete hobag! Seriously you have issues." Ino said. "So seriously, so what. It's not the end of the world. He's going to forgive you. It's just a matter of time. Why don't you just sleep the night here and it'll be okay in the morning?" Sakura nodded.

"Do you have something I change into?" Sakura said still sniffing.

"Yeah, I have some stuff in the dresser. Help yourself." Ino said still getting sleepy.

"Oh its in this drawer right? The top one?" Sakura asked as he opened it. Ino jolted to life as she heard Sakura pulling on the top drawer.

"No! Not that top one…" she called but it was too late. Sakura looked down to see two large dildos. One was blue and was labeled Sasuke and the other was orange and called Naruto.

"You fucking slut!" Sakura yelled.

**Part V. Explaination**

"I…I can explain." Ino said.

"You hated Naruto. You told me many times. That's why I started to think he was annoying. Because back then you said he was!"

"Well things change and you tease the ones you like the most right?" Ino said. Sakura started to feel her forehead vein get bigger. "You're forehead is pumping too."

That was the final straw. Sakura jumped on Ino's bed were the two slid off the sheets and tumbled together. Ino had something in her hand hit Sakura across the face to protect herself.

"Give me that you bitch." Sakura confiscated Ino's weapon only to reveal a tiny pink vibrator labeled, Sakura! Her eyes widened in horror and she realized Ino wasn't wearing anything from the waist down. "I think I'm gonna go now."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Experimental (I don't know if I should keep it. Its an unfinished chapter. I might totally scrap it. Its just an idea. Its funny but I'm not sure I'd really see Sasuke act like this even though I think hes probably a closet case. Reply if I have a good or bad idea going.)**

**Part I. Machinations. **

Ino felt horrible in the morning. There was possibility to salvage this situation. Very few ninjas she trusted to have the intelligence to formulate a plan. In her life, shes always depended on life and death on a certain apathetic and lazy ninja named Shikamaru. He was her only hope. This is how she ended up meeting him for coffee really early in the morning. The sunlight hurt her eyes. She knew she needed to patch her already shaky relationship with Sakura and if there was a way, he would know. Even if she was a pervert, Shikamaru wouldn't care or judge. He never really cares about anything.

"Yeah you're kinda fucked." he said.

"What? You must know something."

"You're probably going to hear this from a lot of shrinks but you're really. i mean really really fucked up."

"You said you wouldn't judge me!"

"Yeah I kinda lied." Shikamaru folded his arms and looked at the sun. Finally he had one hand raised to the sun and was drinking his coffee with the other. The shadow casted though the cafe window stretched over to Ino and in between her legs. She instantly knew what he was planing to do but it was to late. The sensation of his shadow started to finger her inside. She hated to admit it, but it felt really really good.

"What the hell are you doing!" she said trying not to make a scene. Shikamaru had a wicked smile.

"I have one idea for you. To patch up your differences with Sakura you need to have the same goals. Hence, the enemy of my enemy is my friend." he continued to wave his fingers in the air. Ino gripped on to the edge of the table hanging on every word.

"Who's my enemy? Who's Sakura's?"

"You really are an airhead, Tsunade is your enemy. In actuality, you've already messed up your friendship with Sakura. The only thing you can do now is seduce her in her moment of weakness. Then again what do I know. I hate girls."

"You're a genius!" Ino said. Then she shoved her coffee on Shikamaru's lap forcing him to release his hold on her. "Oops." she winked. "Bye bye. You really came through for me. You're the best semi-gay friend, a girl could have! Maybe you can finish what you started sometime."

Shikamaru folded his arms behind his head and reclined back in his chair. _What a sick girl,_ he thought. _I think I'm in love_.

**Caught by the Anko**

Tsunade felt different this morning. She felt different every morning. The air was lighter and she could actually enjoy the beauty of the village. She strolled though the village and bought some flowers to put in a face. She bought things for breakfast she never buys. Exotic spices, cheeses. She couldn't understand these cravings for weird food but she knew shes been snacking a lot lately. It was rare that shed be out and about at this time but with work being pushed on Sakura and Shizune she decided a nice walk would do her fine. She decided to stop by and see what her little fox was doing. At this hour hes usually training in the forest.

Naruto charged up chakra and started to over head lift some boulders. He was wears no shirt and the sweat started to shine on his body. This was no good. Tsunade wanted to race over and take advantage of her little fox. There was no reason they both couldn't have a workout. There was no one in this forest. She raised her hand to yell hey to Naruto but she stopped when she saw Anko approach her Naruto. Tsunade watched in the distance.

Anko wasn't a discrete girl. She was considered a bit brash and cocky. Much like herself, however, Anko was younger, and perhaps more attractive. "I see you're working out Naruto. So am I. So few ninjas actually hone their skills. They can't appreciate what a good workout does for your body." Anko took her metal top off.

"Its getting hot in here." Naruto's attention was fixed up on the boulder.

"Just a second here. Just another 20 reps." he said and then continued to count to himself. Anko went under the boulder and behind Naruto and wrapped her arm around his wet body.

"You know I can spot you, and you can spot me on something else." She blew in Naruto's ear.

"Hey cut it out that tickles!" Naruto became unstable and finally with a thrust, he threw his boulder over head behind him. "What do you think you're doing?" Naruto yelled. However the both of them looked the boulder in horror as Naruto didn' have time to place the rock back on its correct axis and it began to pick up momentum as it rolled their way. "Holy shit! Naruto! No time!" They began to run down toward the forest until several large trees stopped the motion of the rock. Anko landed on Naruto. She laughed.

"I'm sorry Naruto." Naruto looked at a shirtless Anko.She was wearing snake skin undergarments. "Oh no, when we ran into the forest, I got my snake skin bra cut. On my its sliding off! Oh this is so embarrassing. Naruto aren't you going to help me?" Naruto felt his chakra boiling. Only it wasn't his chakra. He was getting turned on.

"Why are you hesitating, use my power." Kyuubi said. "Listen brat, I haven't gone doggie for so long."

"Whats doggie?" Naruto asked.

"What?" Anko asked. "Who are you talking to?" she giggled. She sucked on a finger then ran one along Naruto's chest unaware of the mental conversation.

"Use my chakra, use my power. Lets take this human!" Naruto looked down and realized he was getting extremely hard.

"I can't."

"What are you, gay?" Kyuubi said

Naruto helped Anko to her feet and walked back to his rock clearing. He picked up his jacket and put it around her. "Its really dangerous. Don't play with people caring weights. We could have been crushed."

"Do you even have a cock?" Kyuubie said.

Tsunade cheered inside her heart. She then turned her attention to Anko. If its a war she wants...

With Naruto leaving the scene, Anko continued walking out of the forest toward where Tsunade watched her ex-friend pass her. Anko clinging to shirt looked ever so slightly at the ground. Tsunade looked at toward the ground as well. Her arms were folded. They acknowledged each others existence with a sly exchange of smirks. As Anko passed Tsunade she said, "I just want a little taste."

**Part II: Hypocratic Oath**

Tsunade was lounging around her house. She was waiting for her special man. The truth was due to reckless actions she had many problems. One was named Sakura, the other Ino and now Anko. All of them were younger then her and were more cunning. Tsunade thought for a second. _What am I to do? Naruto was never mine to begin with. I was the first wasn't I? I should have him. However there is a lifetime for him to make mistakes, to mess up, to learn. Good things can't last forever. Then again he was young, he needed to protect her young man from those snakes. Those torns without the roses. Tsunade laughed at the hypocracy of it all._

There was a draft. Tsunade went to inspect the open balcony when she felt arm wrap around her. What a sneaky ninja. But she accepted those arms. She felt long fang-like teeth press into her neck. His body was pressed up behind her.

"I suppose you haven't even given your first passion mark."

"Whats that?" he asked.

"Its okay we'll both heal fast." the two began to kiss furiously and then they bother worked on each others neck.

"Bam!!" There was a commotion from the the door down stars and it sounded like many feet pattering into the main lounge. One was a pig and so obviously the other was Shizune. "Mistress! I can't possibly do all the work for you. I've put it off far too long but i need you to authorize signatures for ninja health policies and ninja dental plans, ninja equal ops and amendment policies. Oh and the ninja 401K plan! Its a a nightmare!"

And then Shizune saw Naruto still wrapped up in Tsunade's arms.

She dropped the papers.

Then there was an earthquake which then became clear it was Sakura storming in. She was very strong. Almost as strong as Tsunade but lacked the grace. She was angry.

"I've been doing a lot of thinking sensei and its just not right. YOu're too old and its just plain weird and I can't just accept you're seeing Naruto even if it will cost me my...oh shit..." Saukra stopped to see Naruto. Then trailing behind the maelstrom was Ino. "Listen Sakura maybe you shouldn't just march in here. I mean what if no one is home." Finally Ino was up to speed with the situation.

"Why is everyone just marching into my home? First off, Shizune, ninjas don't get any policies, there is no retirement plan, no health plan , no dental. Nothing. No workers comp nothing. Sakura, you're crazy and you don't get to but into people's lives. Let them make their own mistakes and Ino, I'm going to kill you just because! So everyone get out so I can pack and leave the village and I'm taking this guy with me! When we get back I want everything back to normal Okay!"

Naruto walked up to Sakura. "I'm sorry Sakura-chan its just over. You're too late. Just let me be free."

"How can we be over when we never started! It just aggrivates me that you don't think and you jump into situations beyond your control and love is something you can't win with your ninja abilities or chakra power!" Suddenly Sakura grabbed him and kissed him as hard as she could. Naruto struggled to break free.

"Sakura! Let go of me. Get a grip!" Tsunade pryed her off and threw Sakura off and into a wall." Still weak, Sakura tries to keep fighting Tsunade in a cat fight. Severely outclassed, Sakura falls to her knees with a final blow, Tsunade left Sakura on her side. Ino rushes to her side. Tears fell from Ino's eyes. "Sakura!" she said then she began cradle her.

"Naruto, you just don't understand love yet."

"Why does everyone think I'm so stupid!" Suddenly everyone in the room stares at Naruto. "Are you serious?" Naruto looked to see Kakashi crouching on the balcony railing. He was spying the whole time! Lurking in his hiding place. What was he doing here?

"What do YOU know of love?" Sakura heard Naruto's words and he was right! What did she know of love?

"You're right Naruto. I don't know anything..." she had lost.

"She knows plenty. Sakura is love!" Ino yelled and then wiped her tears and began to to kiss Sakura passionately. Everyone is frozen. Shizume speaks up. Sakura still weakened from the assault could not resist her perverted friend from assaulting her mouth with her tongue.

"I have to go get some more paper work done!"

"I see why you told me Make-out Tactics was boring. It doesn't compare to what I have just witnessed with my Sharingan eye. It is you who should be the master. Naruto-senei." Kakashi bowed. "Let me become your pupil!"

Tsunade sighs and rolls her eye. Finally she drags Naruto by the arm like a doll. Naruto is smiling innocently but still honored at Kakashi's words. "Feel the energy! Kakashi, its leaking everywhere like Chakra." Kakashi is writing every word Naruto says as if it were spoken from god. FInally Naruto whispered in to Kakashi's ear.

Kakashi's eye widened, "I see, Anko's chakra is leaking everywhere. Her seal must be broken."

Naruto who is still be dragged by Tsunade looks at Kakashi. "Now go my student." His grin is as wide as his head and Kakashi must be grinning as well under his mask.

**Part III. Sasuke's Rear-turn...er Return.**

That night Sasuke was sitting under a tree in the courtyard of his former academy. Nostalgia filled the air and he knew he was finally home. It was a lonely cold scene and it felt so long ago. A lot has changed, his sword, his clothes. He was finally strong. He had one goal in mind. To find his childhood friend and complete the beautiful cycle of his life. If Naruto kills him, he would finally be at peace after years of vengeful killing and seeking of power. If he wins, he will prove to that smug bastard once and for all that true power is from the pain and hatred as his brother once told him.

Sakura passed this same academy. She needed to reflect about her feelings for Ino. Suddenly she gasped. He had returned. Her Sasuke, her love, she wanted to hug him and weep in his arms but she was more solem than that. "So you have returned." she said. "Thats good. You will finally find peace here no matter what you have done in the past."

"Who said i was here for peace or atonement? I came for him."

"So you didn't come back for me. I see." Sakura looked down.

"I will kill him unless he kills me first." He said.

"Stoic as ever? Why? Why are you willing to do all that? Are you still haunted by the past? None of those things matter anymore."

Sakura ran up and threw her arms around him. She kissed him on the lips. Sasuke gave her a hard shove. "Have you lost your senses? You can't change my goals. You can't subvert our destiny. We're going to see who was right all those years ago."

"I just missed you, thats all."

"Hmmpf, you're still as annoying as ever." Sasuke stopped and looked at his former friend. "Thank you." he said. "Tell that brat to meet me tomorrow outside the village at noon. Tell him this is where we find our truth."

**Prep**

"Tsunade, honey." Naruto said to his sleepy beauty. "I'm going to go tomorrow. I just found out some has come back into my life."

"What?" she moaned? "Go back to sleep she said. We can do it again in the morning." Naruto laid in bed. He looked up at the stars which can be seen in Tsunade's bed room. She had large windows that filled the room with moonlight. IT was a perfect night. If he died tomorrow, it would be absolutely a perfect last night. He had a beautiful woman, and a beautiful moon light night. He looked at her nude body and then stared at the stars again.

**Brotherly Love  
**

Sasuke stood peering over Naruto. He had finally found his so-called friend. He drew out his long hard sword and raised it over his head.

"I finally killed Kabuto." Sasuke underhand tossed a severed head and stumbled to Naruto's feet. "It was I who killed Orochimaru. I was the one that killed his student and finally I will have my revenge. Only to my surprised you killed that guy. Itachi Uchiha. He was the source of my pain. My hatred."

"Hey listen, I didn't have a choice. He was after my demon chakra!"

"The whole point of me suffering, to become strong, to sacrifice all that I am was to that I could kill that guy and you took it from me! You know there's no way of saving yourself! I won't spare you. If I can't get my revenge, I'll take it from you!"

"I didn't want to take your vengeance from you. If fighting me is the only thing that can grant your peace now, then I will fight. You were like my brother. I felt the same pain that you did. I loved you!" Naruto got into his stance and the red chakra formed around him. The chakra lifted from Sasuke and a smile drew across his face.

"Do you mean it? Because I've been fighting my whole life and now that I'm older I just want to find peace. I remember that the only time I was really happy was with you. I told you we felt the same pain but I thought I was lying to myself. I wanted to find true strength because I was afraid of my feelings. When you were passed out, I left you my head protector and stared at your sleeping body. I kissed your forehead. I wanted to kill you because I was ashamed of my feelings but now that I hear you feel that way, I love you too and with Itachi gone I can be free to be who I really am!!!"

Naruto's chakra turned blue and then died away. "What? What the hell? I meant I loved you like brother." Naruto remembered all those moments training with Sasuke. His arms were around his as they stumbled back to the lodging. All those times when Naruto would put his arms around him and he'd say don't touch him, it was probably dredging up homoerotic feelings inside him.

"Yeah that's what I meant too." Sasuke said. "Now lets just fight to the death!"

Kyuubi's chakra started to bubble. "I told you his eyes were more sinister than mine. He had planed to give you the Thousand years of Pain without his hands. This Uchiha puts the ass, in Ninja assassin. "

"You know what? Theres too much sausage Chakra in this party. I'm gonna bounce. Why don't we just pretend today didn't happen. I used to be the most hated brat in the village and suddenly I got Ino and Sakura acting all weird around me and each other, then Anko started giving me crazy snake skinned underwear that she shed herself, and to top it off my best friend who tried to kill just came out."

"Wait Naruto, come back I…I was just joking. Lets just fight to the death like I said earlier." Sasuke was ready to draw his sword out. There was no saving face now. He had to fight to the death now.

"Hey hey hey!!! Keep that sword of yours tucked way! I don't want to see any of that at all. None of your cursed seal that makes you look like you have blue lipstick, no Sharigan eyes, just keep it to yourself. Lets just do this killing each other thing some other time. I'll keep in touch really."

Naruto disappeared from the battle. "Seriously I was just kidding…Fuck!" Sasuke Yells.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 (If you liked the episode where the team tries to unmask Kakashi and the cook and daughter of the Ichiraku were in aww, you'd get this chapter.**

**Jiraya, Jiraya, Pants on Fiya.**

Naruto has truly surpassed Jiraya. Kakashi looked into the burning garbage can. Finally he dropped Make-Out Tactics into the fire. It was the last book. His bible and false god has fallen. His faith was shattered and he found the coming of the new god reborn. The brat has finally shown his true power and it was the most thought after power. _At first I had my suspicions that Sasuke would be the one who possessed that power. He too was a false idol for although girls were instantly attracted to his aura, my sharingan eye has told me he was into interested in any of them. Finally a shinobi who risen from the ashes of having no game has truly mastered the art and was coveted by far too many women in Kohana._

Later on that evening Kakashi went on to pursue Anko. He needed to. As a disciple to Naruto, he will find the key using his Sharingan eye and the first clue was to see Anko's leaking chakra. Kakashi entered the bar where the young woman was drinking. Her cheeks were red from sake.

"May I sit here with you." Kakashi said

"If you want. Are you going to pull out that stupid book of yours. How can you read that trash?" Anko said. She was harsh and to the point. A very good rival for Tsunade. If Tsunade was jealouse, he could see why.

"Hmm I have just recently taken on words. I guess I have out grown silly novels."

"Oh Good!"

"With my head in a book, I was also very unapproachable. I most likely looked too intimidating to most pretty women. It would be hard to start a random conversation and I also would miss the opportunity to talk to a beautiful woman such as yourself." Kakashi said.

"Or you'd just look like a complete nerd." Anko said. "Want a free shot?"

"Thank you."

"Yeah what was up with that?" Anko inquired, "Do guys really think that's how women work? That we're innocent playthings? Not to mention all that love and use of the word so frivolously. Its just cheesy and nerdy." Her words pierced Kakashi's soul. Was this what women really thought of him? "Are you listening to me? Besides you actually are known as being very intellectual for a man so let me give you some free advice, girls don't go for all that shit. Also you're too proper. Sometimes a wild girl needs a beast and animal that knows how to be rough." Anko started to sway from drunkness.

_I see_, Kakashi thought, _Naruto had demonic chakra. He had animal like behavior. He eats like a slob, he is brash, and controlled by his emotions. He was type of man that Tsunade and Anko wanted. In fact, Naruto and Sasuke were not only rivals in two philosophies. Naruto was the example of the beast that was all that is man. The complete beefcake. Sasuke was the cool unemotional type. Both yielded excellent results. Even within the realm of ninjitsu, Naruto represented the strength of protecting the ones he loved were Sasuke was fueled by hatred. Interesting._

Then Kakashi realized something. He represents a very Sasuke approach to getting girls. By looking cool and not caring about what they thought. Where Naruto applies maybe too much thus forcing Naruto to get hit by Sakura. There was a way to fuse the techniques what both Naruto and Sasuke has achieved. Kakashi was a scientist and here was his thesis on synergy.

"I think you drank enough for the both of us. How about I escort you home." _That was forward_ enough thought Kakashi. He sounded both cool and refined yet forward enough like Naruto would be all on a spin of his own. Or so Kakashi thought.

"Ha, what are you my mother? You hadn't even had your shot yet geek. Come back when you grow a pair of balls_." I don't understand_. Kakashi thought. _Anko was obviously a feminist lesbian type ninja. Wouldn't the silent reserved type be more receptive to her pallet? Perhaps he had read her all wrong. Why couldn't the Sharingan be more useful? Had Naruto lead him astray?_

"I'd love to hear you insult me more but perhaps I could tell you why I came. I was told use my Sharingan eye to observe your leaking chakra."

"You pervert." Anko said still drinking.

"You hadn't let me finished. I can see you don't have any thing wrong. I guess I'll just report back. I believe my sources were incorrect." Kakashi actually failed Naruto's mission.

"You were told to observe me? Who sent you? Tsunade? Well fuck that old bitch. Let me tell you something. Just because she can get the good stuff from a raging hyperactive sexy fox beast, doesn't mean she can just wave it around and not expect this serpent to take a bite. Fuck her and her hypocrisy. I just wanted a taste for myself. " Was this the leaking chakra? Her sexual frustration? His sharingan eye had seen it all and he now understood but it was too late. He had already followed the path of Sasuke's method and failed.

"No. Thanks for the shot." Kakashi said pulled the mask from his face to drink the sake.

"Holy shit you're a hottie!" Anko must have sounded bipolar but she didn't care.

**Kyuubi and the wide Receiver!**

Naruto raced to the bar and did not notice Anko wasted and rubbing up to Kakashi. Bartender "Give me 2 shots of sake."

"Hey get out of here Naruto! Come back when you're old enough."

"Naruto?" Anko broke her makeout with Kakashi and pushed him away.

"Hey there boy...you want a shot?" Anko

"Sure, I need a lot." Naruto said.

"Well I only know give shots one way...body shot."

"Whats a body shot?"

"Well you can't use your hands, you need to drink the shot with your mouth only." Anko placed the sake cup in between her breasts."

To Naruto, time stopped. "Yeah Naruto! Go Long and hard. I will lend you my chakra!" _Shut up, Kyuubi!_

_Just leave me alone!_ _Why have you awakened all of a sudden?_

_"_From the moment you bumped it with Tsunade, you awakened more of my demon powers and now your seal is weakening. I can almost take over. You're body is changing to a beast and you're going to take this woman now. Shes giving herself to you! Do it now. Take her home."

_Give me back my body._

_"I'm not making you do anything. You know you want this!. We've always been apart of each other. I'm giving you what you want. You want to take that woman."_

Naruto's chakra was red. His eyes burned with fire and this teeth turned sharp. Naruto felt rage like he never felt. Not just rage but not angry but severely turned on. He did want Anko. Naruto closed his eyes for a second. _I'm not going to cheat, I just want a shot. _Naruto looked up and smiled his demonic smile into Anko eyes she gasped at the fear of it all but suddenly was inspired.

"Oh my Naruto!" Naruto savagely drank the sake and then he spilled the sake not caring and pounced onto anko lap causing her to fall on her back. Anko was scared. Who was this demon? Could it be the demon? "Hey not so fast! Lets get out of here first." Naruto could not hear her. He did not care to hear her. She was giggling and kissing him back and he was lapping up her neck. "Yes lets go somewhere private." Kakashi was still in a daze watching his student from across the room making out with this girl that he had made strides towards. He snapped out to see that Naruto was different. He saw Naruto's seal was weakening and Kyuubi was enraged. Kakashi chanted and moved his hands and then placed it on Naruto's back thus dispelling the demon within.

Anko was on the floor looking up at Kakashi who she recently found out was attractive. _Two on one, Jackpot!_ Naruto, who was still on Anko stopped in his tracks. His sweat beads dropped down on to Anko who got up and took Naruto by the hand and dragged him and Kakshi out of the bar but Naruto pulled back. Kakashi knew Naruto was not himself and was concerned but also knew he would return to himself for awhile longer.

"I shouldn't have done that. That was a mistake, I should go. I need to be somewhere. Kakashi, walk Anko home."

"Hey Uzamaki! Finish what you've started! Get back here right now! You just can't give me just a little and expect me to let you off the hook."

After a while it was clear that Naruto was not going to return. He started to run faster and faster. Anko looked down at Kakashi who was completely distracted. He started after Naruto to console him of his demonic nature however Anko yanked him by the arm.

"Where are you going handome?" Anko said. Kakashi had a dilemma.

Naruto on the other hand continued to run. He ran harder then he ever had in his life. He ran spare keyed his way into Tsunade's home! He ran up the stairs and into Tsunade's soft loving fist:?

"What was that for?" Naruto barked.

"Where were you? We were supposed to be all packed up to ditch the village so we could be alone together."

"Something happened."

Tsunade had been crying. She was holding a note Naruto had left.

"Naruto I was up all day and night. I read your letter. You were going to fight Sasuke and you could have died and I didn't hear a word from you and it was good bye just like that?" there was silence. "Is he at least dead now?"

"Oh..." Naruto sighed. "Tsunade I had to face him no matter what. Its wasn't so bad. Sasuke got away." He placed his arms around her who felt weak in his presence. Though she has super strength, she felt soft and innocent and younger then she has years with him.

"What if you never returned?"

"I planned on coming back. Even if I died, I couldn't have asked for better in my life." He kissed Tsunade.

"Oh you must have been so brave. That must have been such an epic fight. I would love to have seen you pound his ass." Tsunade pulled her little fox in and kissed him. She pulled him on top of her so that she was laying propped in her bed. Naruto was straddling her but might as well have looked like a boy in her lap. He was pressed close her chest.

"What! I didn't do anything to his ass. What makes you think something like that happened?" Tsunade was confused but giggled and closed her eyes to continue the kiss.

"Tsunade wait, I needed to tell you something."

"It can wait, i need you now Naruto!" Tsunade was an emotional roller coaster.She had transitioned from anger and fear to relief and finally complete horniness.

"No! It can't wait! Miss Hokage!"

"Whats so important Mr. Uzamake?"

"I made out with Anko. She came on to me and I liked it but i stopped. I don't know what came over me. It was fox and it was enraged and he told me he was getting more control of me but it wasn't him that kissed Anko, it was me. I was just a demon but I was still me but I couldn't control the urges. If the chakra hadn't been dispelled, I might have cheated on you. I don't deserve you!" Naruto braced himself for a beating but the beating never came.

"So..." she said sadly. "Is she really that pretty to you?"

"No. I want only you! I only think of you." Tsunade snorted her laugh.

"Ha, you're so innocent and young. It was just a kiss, i don't care about that. Kiss her all she wants, shes not taking my fox."

"You don't care shes trying to take me away from you?"

"Is it working?"

"No, but still."

"It feels good you said you only wanted me even though you sound like a complete dork. I don't really care as long as you still come home and fuck me."

"Is that all you care about? Don't you see this going anywhere?"

"Frankly I don't."

"What? So what is this. I'm I just a fling?"

"No. I'm just not worried. I don't have to think to far into things. I don't want to think about the future. Lets just get out of the leaf village tomorrow like we planned. I really think its cute. The kind of man you are."

"What kind of man is that?"

"My kind of man." She said. Stunned and moved Naruto threw himself in her arms and kissed her and she pulled her pants down as she spread her legs as soon as she got one free. "Now get that fox demon hunger of yours out and start eating me out Uzamaki! Play your cards right and I might let Anko in on our little fun, you little pervert you."

_Yes! _Kyuubi roared!!

Naruto shook his head. "I only want to be with you!"

_You're a homo!_


End file.
